Monday, September 19, 2011

Oddz 'n' Endz

I don't know what to write today - in fact I've drawn a blank for 3 days now. But I want to stay in the habit, so I'll just go where ever my mind takes me.

Today would be my parent's 58th wedding anniversary. My father died 6 years ago. My mother lives just down the hall from us. What do you say to a person on a day they used to celebrate with a loved one that's no longer there? I struggle with that question.

This past Saturday I bought some gladiolas for my mother. (I bought some for my wife too). My father used to bring my mother gladiolas on their anniversary. I remember the flowers standing around in 1 quart mason jars because my mother didn't have large enough vases for them. When I brought her the flowers on Saturday her eyes teared up. "Our anniversary is coming up".

"I know, that's why I brought the flowers."

I called her this morning to see how she was doing. She said, "you should see the flowers. They're beautiful."

I guess I don't need to say anything - the flowers said it.

Last week I wrote about preferring silence over music. Since then it seems music doesn't want to stay quiet. When Heidi read the post she told me she found it sad. She also said that she had refrained from listening to her favourite music for a long time now out of deference for my desire for silence. I don't want to be the cause of her avoiding something she enjoys. So what do I do with that?

Later that same day I was reading a study on David and the author focused on David's music. Especially the healing power of music. I'm feeling prodded now. That evening my mom called and asked Heidi and me to go to the Andre Rieu concert at the MTS Center the next evening. She could get tickets for $2.50 (that's a whole other story) but she didn't want to go alone. So we went. I tried to stay detached from the music - I wanted to be able to sleep that night. Then Andre Rieu went on about how great music was, it was the most wonderful thing in the world, it was healing, etc. This is moving beyond simple prodding.

Yesterday at church I found myself struggling during the worship time. To sing or not to sing? If I don't sing am I refraining from worship? Am I maintaining a gap between God and myself? Did I make a mistake publicly disclosing my preference for silence?

Last night I checked my Facebook messages and found a link to a website along with a request to download some music and provide some feedback. I guess I'll have to revisit this music or silence business.

Speaking of feedback, I have requests for reviews of books I have recently read and been requested to read in my email inbox. I'll have to decide what I'm going to do with those requests.

Heidi is back at work today. Her vacation is over. I need to put together some kind of routine because the day is half over and I haven't accomplished much yet.

It's a beautiful day today. The sun is shining. Not a cloud in the sky. Time for a bike ride.

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